TDRPW Guy Episode 1
(TDRPW Chat, 4:00pm, an argument is ensuing.) Rocker: You racist, homophobic, ignorant motherfucker! GODuncan: No, YOU STFU NOW TD: That's it. ----GODuncan has been kicked by Aqua Infinity.---- Rocker: Thank you. ---Rocker B.A has been kicked by Aqua Infinity.--- Rocker: Fuck you. Dark: *imitating Heo* Guys, chill. Boograssi: Where has Heo been lately anyway? Rocky: Stalking bitches at Friendly's, passing water bottles at Domino's, fapping to Hot Asian's monthly, fuck if we know. Chwiis: He's probably at Church. Fiz: ^ Boograssi: On a thursday night? Rocky: Well, he is a huge fuq boi. Boograssi: I know but still, that's way too much Church in one week. Toast: Maybe he has a crush on the priest. Chwiis: I bet they listen to Colton Dixon CDs together. RJ: XD ---Heozaki has joined the chat.--- Dark: Look who it is. Heo: Not much time guys, help me! Rocker: . Boograssi: The hell are you talking about? Heo: Me and my family are being sent back to our country, get to Arizona, ASAP!!!!!!!!!!!! ---Heozaki has left the chat.--- Rocky: Another shit gimmick by Heo everyone. I wonder who he is going to screw over for Survivor Series. Dark: Me tbh. Boograssi: This is way too random, what if he really is being taken away. RJ: That would be great, dibs on Alejandro. Rocker: Dibs on Trent! Boograssi: Nobody is calling dibs on anything. RJ: Awe. Rocky: It could be plausible, I mean, his name is Benny and he likes Taki's, that's a huge red flag. TD: Um, even if it was true how would we get to Arizona. Chwiis: Somebody could pay. Grass? Rocky? Rocker? Rocker: I can't right now, I got my eye on these kickass shoes. GODuncan: Why does that matter, you're just going to steal them. Rocker: Go get raped by the devil. Fiz: I can pay for it. TD: How would you have the money? Fiz: I just do. Boograssi: All right than... RJ: Yay, free trip to Arizona! (The Wiki members are seen on the Air Plane.) Toast: *whispers* Did you expect Grass to look like this? Boograssi: You do realize you just whispered to me right? (RJ is sitting is his chair, bored. He locks eyes with somebody else as the two rush to the bathroom.) Fiz: Looks like I'm not the only one in the mile high club. *smokes dat good shit.* Chwiis: Aye mate, pass that stuff! Pilot: We are now at our destination, please exit the plane in an orderly fashion. (RJ and the man walk out of the bathroom.) Shrek: Thanks for the good time. RJ: Any time. Rocker: I'm just going to ignore ever seeing that. TD: Same. Toast: So, how exactly are we going to find, Heo. Rocky: I have an idea. - Man: Hello and welcome to Dominio's! (Rocky socks him right in the face and heads to the back.) Rocky: Now, all we need to do is check the computer for the address where Domino's has been delivered to recently and we'll find Heo. (Rocky searches through the database and finds a location which has been ordering Domino's on a consistent basis.) Rocky: Found it! GO: GREAT, WE GO THERE NOW! Chwiis: What he said except less retarded. Boograssi: I wonder what's happening to him right now. - (Heo is tied up in the back of a truck about to drive off.) Heo: *cries* LET THEM SEE YOU....*SNIFFLES* IN ME!!!!!! LET THEM FEEL YOU, WHEN I SPEEEEEAAAAAKKKKKKK *SNIFFLES* LET THEM SEE YOU.....IN MEEEEE-- Immigration: Shut your corny ass up. - (The gang steal a car and drive off as the manager shouts from the distance.) Noah: THANK YOU, COME AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Chwiis: I don't really trust RJ's driving. RJ: Why not? Chwiis: Because you're RJ. Rocky: I agree, you'll probably crash the car on purpose so you can say "#Blindside" RJ: I was not going to do that, god! Rocker: Wait a minute...... Boograssi: What? Rocker: Why are we doing all of this for Heo's bitch ass? Toast: Because reasons. GODuncan: BECAUSE YOU SUCK DOGGY DIK! Rocker: This mothafucka...... (Rocker takes his belt off and starts whipping the shit out of GO) GODuncan: HELP, HELP, I'M GETTING ATTACKED BY A 14 YEAR OLD DONALD GLOVER!! Dark: I'm too Max Goof to have lines right now. Boograssi: I swear kids these days don't no how to act in the car...... Rocky: Really, I thought you were used to having kids struggle in your car. Boograssi: Kiss my ass. TD: GUYS CALM DOWN DON'T MAKE ME START KICKING PEOPLE OUT OF THE CAR! RJ: #BLINDSIDE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (RJ crashes the car right next to the building.) Fiz: Sweg. (A billboard falls on top of them as we switch over to Heo.) Heo: Lord, before I die please forgive for all I have done. I'm sorry for the time I went into Gamestop and stole all those PS2 games with my fellow esse's. And that time I harassed all those poor ladies at Panda Express thinking they were Ally....I probably should have noticed the difference after the third or fourth time. I'm also sorry for all those girls I ditched so I can roleplay on a wiki. Please accept this - Immigration: You do realize you're going back to Mexico right, we're not going to kill you. Heo: Well If I'm going to Mexico I might as well be dead! Immigration: *shrugs* Heo: Who called to get me deported me anyway? ??: I did. Heo: You....... Chip: It is indeed me. Heo: But why!? Chip: Isn't the fact you're Heo reason enough? Heo: No! Chip: Well it is but ok. You ruined me! You blocked me, made a new wiki and never let me return! I had to go work at Ryan's wiki, do you know what I had to do for modship! Things....very bad things I'm not proud of..... (Chip buries his head into one of the Immigration men, crying. He yells in gibberish as the door is kicked down.) Chip: What the hell!? Toast: Heo, we're here to save you...I guess. RJ: OH MY GOD CHIP! (RJ tackles Chip.) RJ: DO YOU HAVE AN OC? GIMME GIMME GIMME!! TD: RJ! (RJ regains his senses and heads back to the group.) RJ: *whispers* You can give me the OC after they kick your ass :) Chip: You see RJ I would be getting my ass kicked if it wasn't for the fact they have guns and you guys have nothing, so....... GODuncan: THEY HAVE ME, WE GOD NOW!!!!!!!!!! (GODuncan charges as the men shoot him in the chest!) GODuncan: I GO PASS OUT NOW! (GO falls to the floor, dead.) Rocky:.......... Heo: ............... TD: .................. Chwiis: AWESOME! I'M BUYING DRINKS MATES, WE CAN GO TO HUNGRY JACKS AFTER THIS AND - AWE SHIT. (The men have the gang at gunpoint and begin to tie them up.) Rocker: This was such a great plan, Jan. TD: Are you really going to do this right now? Rocker: True....YOU'RE LUCKY I DON'T HAVE MY GLASSES OR I'D BE FINNA TO GO ALL KEANU REEVES IN THIS BITCH! TD: Much better. RJ: You know, this reminds me of that time in #Survivor where- Toast: Seeing as this is like #Survivor can we vote you out? Heo: *mellowed* Guys, chill, all of this stuff has made me realize that all of the stuff we go through is just trivial, I mean we go online to have fun but look at us now, arguing all day and about to get shipped away to the worst place on earth when all this could have been avoided if we were just a little nicer...... This also made me realize that Fiz is selling some premium stuff! Fiz: Great message, now that'll be 20 bucks. Heo: I only got two and I need it for ice cream. Fiz: I hate you. Boograssi: You know what, he's right, we just need to be level headed sometimes. Dark: Yeah. Rocker: ... TD: …. Rocky: ARE YOU FREAKING STANDING!? Dark: Yeah, they forgot to tie me up before they left. Heo: WHY HAVEN'T YOU UNTIED US!? Dark: I'm too Max Goof to untie stuff. Boograssi: I swear if you don't untie us I'm giving Samey to Garret for PI. (Dark unties the knots much to his chagrin.) Toast: What do we do now, there all still in the building? Chwiis: Allow for the expert survivalist to handle this! Heo: Where did he get the hat? Chwiis: Don't question it. (Chwiis walks out of the room and gestures for them to follow.) Chwiis: All right mates, you need to be real silent, you let one of these guys know you're here and the whole group will get'cha. (Chwiis and the gang sneak around the building for twenty minutes, avoiding guards and the like until finally reaching the room where Chip is.) Chwiis: This is the flat of one of the most vile, disgusting things on the planet, boy I can't wait to have it hanging on my wall! RJ: Hey, don't you talk about my bestie like that! Chip: Who's there!? Chwiis: God damn it RJ.....Well 'Ello Chip! Chip: Get them! Toast: You know what Family Guy comes on in like 30 minutes and this is starting to drag, it's about time I finish this. (Toast walks up to the guards and stares at them as they look on confused.) Toast: KAME... Rocker: Wow, this guy is just going to snub One Piece.... Toast: Hama....hamaaaaaa......... Fiz: This is such an ass pull to be honest. Dark: It's DBZ, shut up. Toast: HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Toast blasts a wave right through all the security guards leaving a hole in the wall and debris all over the place.) Heo: What the heck *cough* Rocker: Found my glasses, I don't have to react to shit now #KeanuReeves Boograssi: One of them is still moving! Rocky: The bastard's probably after my cashews. (The dust clears to reveal Chip still standing. Half of his face is blown off and he seems to be dazed.) Chip: TROLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL. (Chip falls to the floor with that final comment, having been defeated.) Garret: Cameo time! I'll just be taking this.... (Garret drags the body off screen.) Toast: Ha, it's funny because he's getting raped. But yeah, I just blew up half the building's foundation so yeah....better run now. Boograssi: If you don't get out in 10 seconds you're going to get killed! 10 (Rocker uses his Keanu Reeves powers to get outside) 9 8 7 (Fiz and RJ make it out) 6 (Heo and Rocky get out) 5 (Chwiis rides a dingo out of the building.) 4 3 (TD and Toast manage to run out.) 2 1 (Boograssi gets out.) "0" (The building collapses.) TD: YUS! (The gang celebrates as Heo holds his head down.) Heo: Guys....... Fiz: What? Heo: Dark...... (The team all join in the sulking, realizing what just had happened.) Dark: What? Rocker: But-how!? Dark: I'm too Max Goof to run for my life, that's how. Heo: Well.....we still lost GO. Chwiis: Eh, fuck that guy. RJ: Yeah, he's a douche. Rocker: WHO'S SUCKING DOGGY DIK NOW, HUH GO!? (We head up to Heaven as GO is seen sitting in a chair watching what's going on from below. A tear goes down his eye.) Cashier In The Sky: May I take your order? GO: Indeed you can.... (GO hornily lunges for the Cashier.) GO: WE HAVE SEXY TIME NOW! Cashier: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (End.) Next Time: Things go awry as The Gang are taught the ways of Keanu Reeves and some abuse this new found skill.